Financially—that’s one of those words that I always have to type out slowly, to make sure I get the ‘n’s’ and the ‘c’ and that second ‘i’ all in their right spots. That word, and ‘management’ somehow always get me tripped up. “Is there an ‘e’ in management??” I’ll randomly call out, whether someone else is there to answer me or not. If he’s there, The Boyfriend usually does answer, and is kind enough to not remind me of how many times I’ve asked him that same damn question. Usually.
Finances have been on my mind lately, as this past year was (as I imagine it was for countless other people), a bit of a roller coaster. Money-wise, it sucked big time, and I am further in debt that I thought I would be at this point in my life. Not scary, “Oh god what have I done” sort of debt; rather a low, frustrated, growl-in-the-back-of-my-throat with a ‘dammit’ thrown in for good measure, debt. But still. Not great, and I had hoped 2015 would be the year I got out of debt. Ha ha on me, I guess.
Happily, it was also a year of me getting my shit together in other respects, and I worked a couple new jobs that, while they probably won’t pan out to be very helpful financially, were pretty great experiences, and opened doors, and helped me to see that, “No, I don’t need to be stuck in the same rut, doing the same things, just because. Look what I can do over here! and Look at me doing this nifty thing!”
So, that was nice.
Other Things On My Mind:
- I’m in my mid thirties, and I still have the same interests as I did when I was 5. Is this a good thing? I’m not so sure. At least I’m consistent, I guess.
- I’M IN MY MID-THIRTIES. Not that I mind, really…it’s just…..I don’t feel like I’m in my 30’s. That’s what people say, I suppose, and it’s true. The fact that I have not grown up to look like an adult, but rather an aging pixy doesn’t help matters. People do frequently assume I’m still in my 20’s (cool), but consequently I’m also not taken as seriously as my taller, more adult looking female co-workers–who are frequently younger than me. (Not so cool). —-I have a vivid memory of my grandmother (Ruthie was her name. She was adorable) telling me that she didn’t feel like a 65 year old woman, that really she simply felt like a 20-something in a body that didn’t cooperate as well as it used to. I get my aging pixy tendancies from her, but she was a heck of a looker, whereas I’m more of the “cute”, or “pleasant looking” variety.
- I am WAY over-due for my yearly gyno appt. Like 4 years over due. This is not good, since I am at risk for issues in that area, and have had to have preemptive procedures done in the past. But, not having insurance makes things difficult. Planned Parenthood is my best option, but I keep finding reasons to not go. Either, I can’t get 4 weeks worth of my pay stubs organized to prove that I need a discount for payment, or I keep timing the appointments for the exact wrong time of the month. It’s a mess, and the longer time passes, the more anxious I become about how things are going down there, and I feel certain twinges of discomfort that make me fear the worst. The concern of “can I ever have a kid” has morphed into “have I left it too long….will I see 40?”.
blah blah, health issues, blah blah money. Boring. Here’s happy stuff:
- Twinkle lights
- The last remaining 50 chimpanzees are being retired from research! See? It’s true!
- Chock Full O’ Nuts coffee in my Harry Potter mug
- my Christmas tree this year
- hanging out with my niece and nephew
- the tree outside my bedroom window
- the fact that my plant ‘Phyllida’ did not die after I inadvertently let her freeze by the kitchen window a few weeks back. I’ve had her since 1998, so I’m rather attached, and felt awful for neglecting her like that. But she’s on the mend, and I’m grateful.
- the Red Mars, Blue Mars, Green Mars books that The Boyfriend got me for Christmas.
- the fact that since I’ve taken Sundays off from work, I can now spend some weekends with said niece and nephew. Not great for my financial woes, but money isn’t everything, and pretty soon those little monsters will be taller than me, and will know how uncool their aunt actually is. Better get my time with them in Now.
One of my pigeons (I have 2) is now letting me know that I’ve been remiss in paying attention to them today. Time to go fix that. Thanks for stopping in.